had a super fun night with ginny. appetizers and drinks. then a movie. then out for more drinks. we didn't get in til 3am. that never happens. lol i actually fell asleep about 4...and have been up since 7am. really???? ugh.

i got up off the couch this morning and went into "our room" and started throwing away pieces of my life. i filled a couple of trash bags before i couldn't take it anymore. i don't think i've ever cried so hard in all my life. i felt like i was going to fall apart completely. i guess it's a step in the right direction, but it hurts, hurts, hurts.

eric spent part of the day with the boys yesterday. they had a good time. he said he couldn't wait to see them again. :( weird. it's just ME he doesn't like anymore. JUST ME. he took off for the weekend to waycross again. no problems with him moving on. that hurts so much too. it's like i never fucking mattered. HOW???

i wish everything related to him could just disappear. especially the pain.

we still have to separate our verizon bill. and i found out today that the comcast bill is in his name. didn't even know it. there's always going to be one more thing to deal with.

i hate feeling so alone. i hate being lonely. i must not like myself very much, huh?

danielle's coming over today. we're going to savannah to best buy and then back here to visit mema.

i'm so depressed today. so freaking depressed. how can a person not run out of tears?????????? how is that not possible????